Anger Management!

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We live in a world where, with each passing day, it is becoming more and more difficult to maintain our calm and not get angry – everything seems to stress us out and, in extreme situations, elicits a very angry response from us. And the irony here is that all of us are aware just how harmful anger is, and yet we continue to become more angry.



In most cases, the root cause of anger is nothing but a deep sense of helplessness. Think about it – we always get angry and react negatively in situations that we just cannot alter, when a sense of desperation and helplessness seeps in, anger comes out. And it is okay to get a little angry once in a while, after all we should never suppress our emotions lest they eat us up from within. But, yes, we do need to keep a check on those angry outbursts for the sake of our own health as well as the well being of the loved ones around us. Here are a few simple ways in which we can manage our ever increasing anger in a healthy and efficient way –
Do you have an inherent tendency to get angry? Do certain situations make your stress level shoot up and convert you into a potential shouting hazard? How many times in, say, a week, do you get angry? Ask your loved ones these questions and keep an open mind when it comes to their replies – ask your wife/husband, brother/sister, mom/dad. Analyzing ourselves from time to time helps us become better and better, removing unnecessary habits right at the start. Do you have an anger problem?

Think about it – will shouting and picking up a fight with the reckless driver who insists on honking at you every ten seconds help anyone? Will you shouting at him make him a better driver? Will it make him honk less in the future? There is one, simple answer to all these questions and that is a big, fat NO. So ask yourself, how is your getting angry and creating a scene helping anyone? Someone is honking, just let them. And this applies to all walks of lives. You can shout and fight and become angry all you want but in the end you will just have to let it go. So why not do it today?

Are you a glass-half-full or a glass-half-empty kind of a person? Take some time off and give this little question a nice, long thought. Do you tend to focus on the positives or the negatives? It’s a known fact that people who have a positive disposition are naturally better at handling both stress and anger. The simple reason for that is the fact that optimists find hope in every situation which automatically calms them down. If being positive isn’t a part of your personality, take steps to inculcate it. trust me, it will do you a world of good!

This is something which was taught to us when we were toddlers in school – look before you leap. Just like we should look at all aspects involved before taking any major decision, we need to take a minute to pause and think before we launch into, say, a fight or an argument. We need to realize that bitter, harmful words spoken by us in a fit of anger can have a devastating effect on our relationship with our nearest and dearest ones. And sometimes, as tragic as it is, the damage can be irreparable. So think and ask yourself – will my getting angry benefit anyone? Will I end up hurting the other person with my words? Is my anger justified? Is there any other non-anger-related route out of this problem that we are in? Will anger just complicate things even further? Am I ready for the consequences that my outburst is bound to have?

If you do indeed have a problem managing your anger, look for effective ways of dealing with it. different techniques work for different people: for some music is the ultimate stress buster which calms ones nerves and subsequently wards off anger; some people find exercise to be a better way to deal with anger and other negative emotions; dance can be seen as a combination of both listening to music and exercising at the same time – what could be better? A number of studies have shown that writing down ones thoughts also helps tremendously as it gives a safe outlet to all the feelings and thoughts and emotions that one otherwise keeps bottled up. For those with a creative bent of mind, sketching, painting and drawing helps a lot. Basically the logic here is to find a positive outlet for all your negative feelings. Try whatever works for you.

Remember, life is way too short to be spent trying to handle negativity. We all wish to lead calm, peaceful lives that are filled with joy. Don’t let something as bad as anger come in the way of that. And don’t be dejected if you do have a tendency to get angry – try these simple steps and surely you will notice a wonderful change in yourself. And so will other. As for now, smile!!